My Creative Life - Age 24 - 27

Most of my life, personally and creativily, I had been on a rollercoaster that was always going up. I really believed that I could do anything and be anything I wanted, but because I had so much privledge and very little doubt I had never encountered the possibility that I was not extraordinary. After graduating my rollercoaster took a very impressive nose dive. I applied to hundreds of teaching positions and never even got close enough for an interview. I tried making work to submit to shows, but I was unemployed and racking up credit card debt because I was too ashamed to go on food stamps so submitting a $20 application fee was not only impossible, but dangerous. Most importantly, for the first time I really needed mental health support, but didn’t know the first thing of how to find it. My best friend had moved across the country and we were living together, but I felt isoloated and like a failure without any knowledge or understanding of how to ask for help.

My work became incredibly random at this time. I would do a project here and there, but most were left unfinished. This is a piece I made for my roommate's boss. It's one of the first more traditional embroidered pieces I've made and loved playing with the textures and color. Also look at that tag! My first post-grad business idea was an embroidery Etsy shop called Planted.

I desperately needed creative structure during this time. That led me to an Eco-Dyeing workshop with Janis Thompson at the Eugene Textile Center. I had never done anything like this and I'm still blown away by the intense colors this produced. I mean, that oak leaf!

I eventually got a job selling handmade rugs and that taught me a world of knowledge on how to work with customers and how to treat, and not treat, employees. Shortly after getting that job I began teaching bookbinding a couple times a week at the University of Oregon Craft Center, a remarkable resource in the Eugene community that offers workshops for most mediums that you could imagine. That job eventually led me to teaching embroidery and screen printing. I was teaching UO students and faculty, and members of the community. I loved it. One of the things that so many of these students had in common was that they were looking to learn something new. They had that same fire to, not necessarily master something, but to learn a new craft, make a couple of pieces, and relish in that experience without risks. That creative environment is contagious.

I would love to make more work like this, but this piece took over a year to make. It's a combination of screen printed fabric and embroidery. This was the beginning of a process I called "improvisational embroidery." I let the mood and color dictate where my the thread went.

I took an incredibly fun workshop with the late collage artist Beverly Soasey during this time. I went in knowing the color palette I wanted to use, but nothing else. She talked a lot about having the medium do the work and allowing yourself to get lost in the layers. This was a combination of watercolor paintings, embroidery, and family photos.

And when the position of being an Office Coordinator for the Craft Center opened up, I didn’t just whisper to myself “I would like to work at that job,” I screamed “That’s my job.”